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TERMINAL HOLIDAY INDEX
On April the 27th-28th 2007 I visited the lovely, laid-back city of Amsterdam in Holland/The Netherlands for ETO magazine, covering the AOExpo. I'd been there about 10-12 years earlier, in a rainstorm and noted at the time that the tarts behind glass looked blooming miserable. I thought, if you're going to stand in a window as an advert, at least smile a bit. No bloke wants to bonk a mardy-faced wench. Anyway, in 2007 they looked a lot happier.
• Amsterdam at night, looking up the Oudezijde Voorburgwal canal, possibly. The church at the back is probably Oude Kerk. • Looking along the Geldersekade towards Wagg. The building at the end was one of the gateways into the Medieval city. • The red light district is lit up at night. Mostly red, but I managed to find this almost sleaze-free angle along one of the famous canals. • For Queen's Day, a big fair sets up in Dam Square. This is it at night. I tried to get friends to join me on the 'Booster' ride on the left, but there were no takers. • A daytime view of Amsterdam, complete with bikes. As the UK's weather gets better, it'd be great to see our city centres given over to bikes too. No, really! • As a part of my two day trip to the city, I got a canal trip on the 'Private' boat. This is us getting ready for the off. Note the 'coffee shop' in the background. • A little later, while out in the lagoon which links many of the cities canals, some kids threw a water-filled balloon at us. They hit someone and I almost laughed. • On the boat trip we went past Chin Restaurant, a famous Amsterdam floating eatery, and if the sign is to be believed, Sex Palace. • Nemo is a very fancy piece of modern architecture, and I liked how its shape contrasts with the recreation of an old vessel parked beside it. • Another view of Nemo, seen when I'd mucked up a geocache I was doing. Geocaching in Amsterdam's not that easy - there aren't many of them! • Lots of churches in Amsterdam, and I liked this one particularly. It's called Oude Kerk, I believe. • One of many oddities I saw in this very picturesque city was this leaning house. I'm just sorry I don't have more information about it. • Seen up one of the town's (it doesn't feel big enough to be called a city) alleys, I really liked this Monty Python inspired sign for a bike repair business. • I set my camera up on a bride and took this picture of myself. Then I noticed my mistake and set it up on a bridge, not a bride. Easy mistake to make... • You can't come to 'dam and not see girls. Girls. Girls! These ones weren't in windows whoring though, they were in a cheesy beauty pageant to find 'Miss AOE'. • To be honest, I'm not oh-so-sure that the one in the middle is actually a girl. But in the spirit of this capital of tolerance, I still accepted a BJ. Kidding! • I really liked this cheeky blonde, but in this shot, it was the folks checking out her ass I was most proud of. Favourite photo of the trip! • Later on, she accidentally sneezed on the pole and brained herself. The party at Onassis was drug-fuelled; I breathed through my teeth to avoid intoxication. • "Excuse me miss". The dancers earned their money this night, putting up with some tits who got a bit up close and personal. All part of the job I guess. • Red lighting added some atmosphere, but did make everyone look like they were very angry, and suffering from high blood pressure. Apparently it's flattering. • I think she was trying to sniff her pits without looking like she was. You know how it is. Last minute rush and suddenly it's all, "Did I put deodorant on?" • Claudia Rossi (left) and Pam Terra were on the canal trip with me (or vice-versa) and we had a nice chat about fashion and hair. Nice girls. • "But I had my glasses on!" squeaked Pam, so I took another shot of these two porn stars as we pulled off into a tight tunnel on the canal. That reads wrong... • Having my picture taken with adult film stars is a regular occurrence. However, it doesn't usually take this many shots to get a nice one. • Take Two, and probably the best one. At least I don't look like I'm being fingered... • Take Three, and my "Oh!" face is back. I don't really know why I made such heavy-weather of this. Usually I'm so photogenic. Legal notice - This page, inc. graphics and multimedia features are the intellectual property of Paul Smith and are protected by copyright. Last updated 13/05/07.