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July 2007: PAUL'S PIECE - Fun in the sun with Slipland
I originally met Pam Hughes of Slipland.net at the Guild of Erotic Artists open day I attended back in March. She was there with a gaggle of models in, predictably, slips. Fast-forward three months and she invited me along to Mill Eyot, an island in the Thames outside of Cookham, north of Maidenhead, for another event. June the 10th was going to see Slipland's second boat trip and photography day, featuring around 20 models and the same number of photographers, a BBQ and lots and lots of retro lingerie.
In a world of harder and harder hardcore with DVDA and piss enemas (not in R18 films, but there's a big Internet out there) the gentler pleasures of fetish-lite are often overlooked, which was the reason for me coming along to chat to people at the day. I supposed the antics of Slipland represented a refreshing throwback to more innocent times and as the day progressed, I was reassured I was on exactly the right track.
Sarah Scotchman, who was the girl in the chain top seen in April's ETO was there with her boyfriend Chris, who took having her feather head-dress attached to him in his stride. I also recognised Ms Lux. I'd met her at last year's ETO Show, when Ken Clarke was demonstrating his body casting with her boobs. She's expected back this year, so the cold goo on her chest couldn't have been too bad. Indeed, at least ten artists are expected to be exhibiting at the show, and as this is the issue that'll be there, I urge visitors to go and spend some time with them. There's also the Adults Only show in October which unfortunately for the Guild clashes with both the Skin Two Expo and The Xpo, but they hope to be at as many of the rival events as possible. With almost 200 members, at least they can spread themselves around a bit.
Silvee, who I'd met at Erotica 2006 was there too and showed me a little story about her and Colin in the June 14th issue of Pick Me Up magazine. It was about her introduction to the world of topless modelling and was almost entirely made up. Still, she'd been paid for the phone interview and Colin was pleased the Guild got a mention in the article. Speaking of Colin Ballard, the Guild of Erotic Artists' secretary, he was at the event too, and told me Ken Clarke had helped organise it. It was his wedding anniversary though, and with another exhibition to attend that afternoon, he wouldn't be able to make it. While models got ready around us, to a heady mix of makeup and camera talk, it was nice just to sit back and relax on garden furniture with the sun just beginning to burn through the morning mist. A little while later I was feeling sorry for the girls and ladies in heavyweight frocks (with slips underneath, naturally) as the sun began to shine in earnest. There were also ultra-pale goth girls, including one called Fraggle, slapping factor 50 onto every exposed inch while sheltering under a parasol.
Goody bags with name badges (I spotted another Paul Smith in the crowd) were handed out as more and more boxes of suspender belts and girdles immerged from the minibus. Speaking of the minibus, the original plan was to use it to ferry people from the end of Odney Lane in Cookham across Formosa Island to Mill Eyot. However, a change of lockkeeper and a more rigorous interpretation of the 'no vehicles on the island' rule had resulted in a bit of a delay and a certain amount of walking. Thus the 10am start was pushed back to 10.30, when models and photographers were paired off according to a complicated spreadsheet Pam's husband Darren was in charge of and disappeared into the bushes in all directions. Half an hour later everyone swapped around, and so it continued until the smoke from the BBQ signalled it was time to take a break with sausage in a bap with lashings of ketchup and a cheese slice.
I chatted to several photographers and models over lunch and discovered a few weren't members of the Guild of Erotic Artists. Then I noticed Colin's pile of application forms and knew he was taking full advantage of the day to do some promotion too; he'd had at least two more people approach him about signing up.
John Henry told me about a young Dita Von Teesesque model he'd recently worked with, as well as the locations he'd sourced for shoots. A triple level nuclear bunker under a 50s bungalow near Ongar, double-decker buses and an ancient rotting Rolls Royce being highlights. He introduced me to Guild member Sean Buckley, who he'd met at one of the fetish shoots he'd arranged. He told me about the vampiresses, Matrix-themed and PVC-clad models that'd come along to pose in the bunker's radio room and authentic 50s operating theatre.
Someone had lit the fire to keep bugs away from the camp of portable gazebos, but I was worried someone in a Rayon slip would be in just the wrong place at the wrong time and go up like The Wicker Man. I'm happy to report it never happened, at least while I was around.
Danish Pinkie, or possibly Pinky, was at the event with a German friend called Nicole. Nicole had asked her to come and she was going to enjoy a few days in London as well as larking about on the island. She told me, "It's really nice here. People are friendly and it's very very hot! I just had a swing and that was really nice because of the cool air and the shade. This is my first time modelling for Slipland. Until Nicole told me about it I'd not heard of it before. My world is expanding thanks to her. Denmark's really small so we don't have any of this-" she indicated other models nibbling at the vegetarian option. "The retro thing back home is just tiny. I live in a small town and I stand out with my tattoos there much more than I do here! I'm the local they point and stare at," she laughed.
As Colin Ballard waltzed past me with a video camera -the Guild intends to produce a DVD of its work in the next six months- I collared Andy Howard who's a Guild photographer. I asked him what he was getting from the day. "Thanks to Darren and Pam, of course, we've lots of experienced models here who are very comfortable with what they're doing. There's lots of accomplished photographers too. They're serious about what they do but it's not a day for getting too heavy. It's an enjoyable day with a nice atmosphere. As I joined the Guild last October I've not been to anything quite like this before. I hope I've got lots of good shots but on a sunny day like this the biggest problem is keeping hold of your highlights. And keeping an eye out in the background as there are people everywhere. I'm sure to find some pictures with feet lurking in the corner of shot."
Darren, who was slaving over the BBQ with Colin, told me about a small crisis with bread rolls while I noticed a model who'd told me she'd given up smoking four months ago have to negotiate her way though clouds of cigarette and cigar smoke. Poor girl! With July 1st's smoking ban I can't help wondering what'll happen to retro-themed (everyone smoked in the 40s and 50s) events indoors. As Slipland seem to enjoy the great outdoors, I don't think they'll be too affected.
Pam and I sat down in the shade and she slowly collapsed. "It's been a very busy morning, but lots of fun. I've had a lot of help from my husband Darren and daughter Lorna so huge thanks to them. I've been photographing models for the Slipland.net website too. I don't regard myself as a proper photographer but I've learnt as I've gone along and pick the brains of every photographer I come across. It started when I needed to photograph the slips to sell on the Internet, with a 1.3Mp camera and lots of heads being cut off! We've been going about five years, with a focus on slips of all eras. They took off in the 30s and were transformed by Hollywood glamour into these sexy, erotic garments. You can keep your ladies in stockings and suspenders -that's nice- but a woman in a slip is just fab." I embarrassed myself by relating slips to my auntie before Pam got us back on topic: "The thing is there's a lot of porn out there, full-on erotica, and this is a very gentle fetish- it's teasing. It's sensual rather than sexual. Seductive rather than graphic. It shows women as being feminine and beautiful and not just as objects to be lusted after. Ladies in our slips are portrayed as ladies. This is the second boat shoot we've organised. The first was a much smaller affair a couple of years ago, with half a dozen models and a couple of photographers and my mother and father helping out with the boat and location. The weather was just as fabulous then too. We've been very lucky! We organised a 1940s shoot last year, and I've done a wedding-themed day too, with six models in wedding dresses. Every time the weather's been great."
I asked about Slipland's future plans, and Pam explained she had another 1940s day planned, and she was looking for the right venue for it. They hope to have a military theme, complete with seamed stockings (and/or lines drawn up the backs of legs in eyeliner). "I know a troop of World War II German soldiers -reenactors, not a group of aged Nazis. Although some do take it very seriously…- and a friend of my father's has got vintage cars and a tank. Before then, the 24th of June is going to be the Guild's fifth anniversary and I'm organising a demo for it. Ladies have different sides; pink and fluffy and raunchy and sensual. We have a model that can portray both sides beautifully. We're calling it Jackie and Heidi. I'm sure it's going to be very good! We're very tongue-in-cheek. We don't take ourselves seriously. We enjoy what we do and we're in the lucky position that Slipland.net is the biggest site of its type on the net and it makes some money for us. There is competition out there but we've been established a long time and have a clientele who come back time and time again. Although women love our slips and other retro underwear, it's very much about men. Quite a lot of our customers relate to slips because of their naughtiness- it was the first piece of underwear they got to glimpse when their teacher reached up to write on the blackboard and her skirt would ride up to give them a look at something forbidden. That's the basis of many a young man's fantasy!"
After food and shaken-off lethargy we had several line-ups with all 19 models before they climbed aboard the 42 foot 'Dicks Den' and did a couple of passes of the island. They made some new friends at a local riverside pub as the boat turned around and then raced back past the islands, bottoms of all sizes, shapes and ages waggling. A couple parked a little further along the island were entertained and even the ducks stopped to watch.
By 3pm, as models and photographers coupled up again to swing from swings over the Thames and be very wary of all the nettles that were around, I said my goodbyes and walked back up the rough grass track through the trees to civilisation, and the welcome sight of the toilet block. With so many people popping up at odd places on the island, I'd not dared find a bush to mark as my own. I pondered the day as one often does at times like these. It'd been a surreal experience, somewhere between a Boy Scout and Guide jamboree and the educational lingerie pages of a catalogue from my childhood. The playful atmosphere Pam and Darren had strived for was very much in place and despite a long stroll back to my car in blistering sun, I had a big grin too. For more information on the day or their business, visit Slipland.net or email Pam @ the same address.