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October 2006: PAUL SMITH’S DEVIANT’S DIARY - Lights, Camera, Sex Shop!
The film Mona Lisa, starring Bob Hoskins and Cathy Tyson, might have been all but forgotten had it not been for the backdrop of a seedy 80's Soho to give it gritty atmosphere and stark realism. When Madrugada -Norway's biggest rock band- wanted a taste of London in their MTV award-nominated video for 'The Kids are on High Street' (which I happen to appear in as Thug #2) it was the often-filmed-in, visually familiar Walkers Court in Soho they came to. These are just two examples of the entertainment industry's long history of using adult businesses to add a bit of spice to productions. What is there in the relationship between 'legitimate' entertainment and adult retail, for each side?
Softy's Hard Stuff is World famous in Bolton for having stared in not one but two Peter Kay shows. It appears in an episode called The Ice Cream Man Cometh of 'That Peter Kay Thing', a series first broadcast in early 2000. The shop was also used in a deleted scene of Phoenix Nights series two, when Paddy (played by Patrick McGuinness) goes to spend the proceeds of a fake 'hit'. The scene appears as an extra on the DVD of the series. Softy's Hard Stuff also provided the sex toy props used in an episode featuring a ladies night 'party plan' event at the Phoenix Club, which the show revolves around. I struggled to contact the shop, so sadly I can't expand on their story. But I can highlight another appearance of a sex shop on television, even though the public hasn't actually seen it yet.
Sharp eyes will spot the Watford branch of SimplyPleasure.com this Christmas in a special episode of Little Britain. Externally transformed into a shop called De Sex Winkel, both the inside and outside were utilised for a scene with Matt Lucas in drag. Matt is the shorter, rounder, balder member of Little Britain's creative partnership of Matt Lucas and David Walliams- who wasn't in Watford for the sex shop location shoot.
Nicky Halsey, southeast regional manager of SimplyPleasure.com for ABS, spoke to me on August the 15th, "They've been here since very early this morning -about 7.30- and have been filming from 9.30. It's gone eleven now and I think they're finished, inside and out. They've completely redressed our window and called the store something totally different as it's supposed to be in Belgium. We'll be in one of two half hour shows this Christmas. We got this job because from outside our shop looks very welcoming, clean and tidy, and the BBC often ask us to participate in things, or lend our stores to them for a period of time. So the BBC contacted us again and asked if we'd be willing to help."
Asked what ABS had done in the past, Nicky said, "We've had some filming with Top Of The Pops and we did a film with Christina Ricci and Reese Witherspoon in London recently. It's something we're keen to do more of in the future, and hopefully people we've worked with will come back and ask us to help again. A big thing is we're discrete. The last thing people want is the paparazzi tipped off where they're filming. There was actually a photographer outside today, who was asked to move several times but no-way was he going to move. That must be quite annoying. I've been told that when they were filming with Matt Lucas yesterday two guys followed them the whole day, even using flash photography to disrupt the recording. We don't want those problems, which is why we're very very discrete."
When I assumed ABS was being reimbursed for the incontinence for having to close the shop for half a day, Nicky confirmed it. "Did we get paid? Yes, we did get paid. I don't want to put a figure to it, but it was a considerable sum. Reasonable for the amount of disruption caused to the shop - they were here yesterday evening doing the window too, 'til about half-past nine, after the shop closed. They had a security guard outside the shop all night making sure no one walked off with any of the signs as they're just stuck to the glass over our logos. The disruption comes from being pushed and shoved around a bit - when they're filming it's not your store, it's theirs."
She continued, "The highlight has been meeting Matt Lucas, who was really polite and very professional. We had a bit of fun with him as he was browsing the toys between takes. He picked up a Rabbit and asked where the clit stim bit goes. 'Does this go up your bum?' he said. When I explained it was for the clit he said, 'Oh I've never understood women's bits', which made us all laugh. The only downside is you do become completely unimportant in your own environment. There's so many people packed into the shop, all doing their job, and your job is basically to keep out of their way. We did sell them a few bits too- particularly a clothing item which became featured as the one they'd brought with them proved unsuitable on the day."
Watford branch manager Andy, who took over the running of the shop earlier this year, was also happy to be involved. He was proud that the look of his store had set it apart from others and made it the BBC's first choice for recording the scene. Little Britain regular Paul Putner, who plays Paul in 'Fat Fighters' Little Britain segments and who was also a cameo zombie in Shaun of the Dead, played Andy's 'role' as shop manager. With greased down hair and a cigarette behind his ear, Paul looked the part, but didn't attempt a Belgian accent. To avoid spoiling the surprise, I'll not say which of his many memorable comedy characters Matt Lucas was playing, but it's one seen in other episodes of Little Britain and not a new creation.
Down on the south coast, Taboo in Brighton wasn't just the Mystery Shopper's choice of great sex shop; Earlier this year production company Shine also picked it to be the interior of 'The Munch Box', a fictional adult store in the second series of the Channel Four lesbian-teen-drama series Sugar Rush. Taboo MD Tim Richardson said, "Before they started filming they sent Location Managers out into Brighton to look for bars and cafés to use, streets for exterior shots, and of course, an adult shop to be The Munch Box. There are a few adult stores in town and they decided ours best suited their needs. Their approach was to simply walk through the door and ask if we'd be interested."
What happened next? "I said we were and we negotiated a fee based on what we'd expect to take on a quiet, early-in-the-week day. Plus a margin to cover disruption to the business, because for four days we had to turn regular customers away. We tried to notify customers as far as possible, with notices up saying when we'd be shut. We wanted to minimise disruption by letting visitors know when we'd be closed as far ahead as was possible. Fortunately we were able to pick what days were ok for filming -all but one that was locked in place by their shooting schedule- so we selected what have traditionally been the quieter days for us. There were two batches of filming, on a Monday and Tuesday and on a Monday and Wednesday. We were able to push one day to the 15th of February. They'd wanted to film before Valentines day but we said no, we can't do anything on the run up to Valentines. So they came in the day afterwards. That was actually the first day they filmed here, so the post-production process must have been quick because the series was being broadcast by June or July. They didn't hang around."
Asked what was involved in filming, Richardson explained, "It terms of what they did to the shop to make it suitable, they took away any packaging with hardcore images on them and replaced them with softer images. As far as the sex toys were concerned, they left them completely on view - which I suppose was the idea! To build and stock a convincing sex shop set would cost them more than the grand a day we charged them to use ours. They filmed at night too, floodlighting the front windows to make it look like daylight outside. When I watched the series I was surprised how heavily featured the shop was. Because they filmed non-sequentially it was interesting to see how the storyline developed too. They got an awful lot done in the time they had the shop."
What were the cast and crew like? "The three lead actresses [Kim, played by Olivia Hallinan, Sugar played by Lenora Crichlow and shop-owner Saint, played by Sarah-Jane Potts] recorded in the shop and they were lovely! Very pleasant. Because we weren't needed, the shop was shut, the phones were unplugged and we couldn't even get on with things in the office upstairs because the microphones would pick us up moving about or talking, we kind of left them to it. So much so that after a few hours we literally gave the director the keys and walked away. As Shine were very professional we had no problem trusting them. They had total respect for the retail environment. Very slick and professional- No problems at all."
Tim continued, "The funniest thing that happened was a street drunk was making use of the on-location catering facilities outside. Perhaps he thought the wagon was a Salvation Army tea-and-sandwiches thing. The external filming was done down by the sea with a fake shop front. They copied ours, calling it The Munch Box because it was a lesbian sex shop, and built it over a café which is actually called Munchbox. They even copied our window lettering design so the inside would match the outside. They did actually get complaints at the Council because people thought it was a genuine shop opening on the 'family friendly' seafront, right by a children's play area. But it was purely a fascia; it didn't go anywhere at all. The magic of television meant as she pushed the door by the sea, it'd cut to inside our shop, a mile or more inland, as she came through our inner door."
When I asked what factors should be considered if approached to allow filming, Tim was clear that it had to be a business-head decision, not an ego-lead one. "By letting ourselves be taken out of circulation on four quiet days, the £4k we got was beneficial to us. It had to be worth our while to do it. In a retail environment you don't know what you'll take on any given day so we had to allow room for that when pricing-up what we'd charge. We negotiated a bit, and had they needed a Saturday to film on obviously we'd have charged more. Actually, had they insisted on a Thursday, Friday or Saturday I don't think we'd have risked the level of disruption to do it because customers come first. Having weighed up the production company's demands against our commercial needs, and factored in payment, the good publicity…all the various angles, I decided it was worth doing. If anything it's helped us as it caused quite a lot of excitement in the area. We've mentioned 'As Seen in Sugar Rush' in some of our advertising and got local press coverage from it too. We even get fans of the series visit while on a pilgrimage to filming locations in Brighton. Casual shoppers have mentioned it too when they've recognised it from the series. Having it featured has just built up a good image of the shop."
So you'd do it again? "There's talk of a third series and if we were approached for a second time to do it, we would. The show's based on characters created by Julie Burchill, who's Brighton based - which is why it was set here. Lots of locals watch the show to spot familiar locations and we've a large lesbian population too, who watched it because it's a good mainstream programme about a lesbian girl too. Heterosexual men seem to like it as well… So it all fits with our being here. If I had any advice for other shop owners who are asked to allow filming, I'd say think it through. If you believe it'd be beneficial for your shop, pick days to minimise disturbance. Everyone knows which will be his or her quiet times. Don't be afraid to negotiate on that and price, because it's got to be worth your while. The disruption for you and your customers is real and the contract you agree has to reflect that. Make sure they're insured for any loss or damage - not that Shine did anything wrong here but when equipment's moved around in a shop full of crew, cast and glass cabinets... Oh, Shine also spent a lot of money on products for the series. Anything taken out of packaging they bought as a prop. Our toys were seen in her [lead character Kim's] bedroom, on the seafront when they got knocked out of a box- And in one scene, when she was buying some vibrating balls, you could see our Taboo logo on the side very clearly."
If you'd like your shop featured in a film or television production, it seems the trick is to be in the right place at the right time with the right attitude and a shop that looks the part. The going rate appears to be about £1000 a day, but you'll need to coolly consider that against the value of lost sales. Not only on the day, but also through the possible knock-on effect of not answering your phones, as it's not every potential customer who'll call back. If you're able to negotiate on the timing of recording as well as price, you should be able to reduce the negative consequences to your trade and make the experience as positive as possible for everyone. Publicity and goodwill generated by 'being on the big/small screen' could also have a beneficial effect on your business's PR for years to come. For an industry so often seen as shadowy, it's good for sex shops to have the spotlight, a bit of razzle-dazzle and showbiz glitz once in a while. It almost makes you want to sing, "Hooray for Borehamwood!" Almost, but not quite.
Paul Smith is still free to a good home. Kinky Job offers to info@snapsandbytes.co.uk please.
Around 2400 words on the secret double life of sex shops Dale.
Paul.