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December 2001: Paul Smith... On those little things that say so much.
Smoking is great. Certainly the Chancellor of the Exchequer thinks so. It makes you look cool and keeps you thin. Very thin, potentially. However, I'd not recommend retailers let their staff do it on the sales floor. I'm not alone in believing it doesn't set the right tone, unless your shop doubles as a Jazz Club.
A local computer store of mine doesn't allow its employees to smoke on the premises. Instead they seem to be encouraged to stand at the threshold, virtually blocking access to the building, puffing away and eyeing passing women hawkishly. They cup their fags in the warmth of the doorway, making the prospect of visiting the shop about as attractive as visiting Chernobyl, and who wants to get that close to a man in an ill-fitting suit and a cloud of noxious gas?
Instead you browse the window for a while, taking in the garishly coloured boxes arranged in a graceless curve. They surround a lonely ISA network card. The artists skill is in making us question what we see, and I for one wondered, "forfuxake, why?"
You hold your breath and enter, but once inside it doesn't get any better. Most items are unpriced. Perhaps it's to save money on little sticky labels. It seems ridiculous not to mark them when they're so dusty you could write the price in that instead. And what is priced is over-priced. The lighting is poor. The walls are white and bare. There are bars at the window and a smell of cooking vegetables in the air. If it wasn't for three tower cases half built in front of me I'd swear I was in prison. Even the dreary carpet tiles look like they're here as guests of Her Majesty. Any second now, I think to myself, the man who's been looking on the verge of asking if I need any help for the last five minutes is going to enquire if I have any snout. I count eight manufacturers in their display (if that's the right word for hanging them on the wall) of cables. I note there's software on the shelves I couldn't sell five years ago. Dark Forces for £19.99 anyone? You just know the owner points at PC World as the source of all his woes, and in a way he's right, because they're really good. Comparatively.
I paint a very nasty picture, but if there's even one element here that reminds you of your own business, then in the name of all that's sane, change it! And if it's all too familiar, you may well own a shop in Aylesbury.
It's not your prices, or informed and attentive staff that lure people into your shop. It's an unobstructed doorway, a bright, friendly interior and a well-organised attractive window display. If you disagree, the only thing drawing crowds into your shop this Christmas could be a sudden downpour of rain. And then only if they can squeeze past the nicotine addict in the doorway.
500 fun-filled words Dale. A rushed job, full of bile and scathing wit. A moral. A hero and a villain. A classic tale of good against evil. Should be right up your alley!
Paul